Keeping the Peace

Likeability – That which makes someone likeable or easy to like, easy to be with, considered pleasant to be around.

Now a good search on the word ‘likeability’ will show you that this is not a new term nor is it something I have made up. You will find all kinds of materials about likeability, for example this book by Tim Sanders, ‘The Likeability Factor: How to Boost your L-Factor & Achieve Your Life’s Dreams’. As with Emotional Intelligence or EQ you can increase your ability to be likeable to others. In fact your ability to tap into your EQ will help you improve your likeability. Being likeable is a skillset. Look at the word like-ability. See? It means you have the ability to be liked. Ability is something you can cultivate it is not an all or nothing trait.

There is a saying in the English language, “You catch more flies with honey than with vinegar.” Let’s put aside the obvious question, who wants to catch flies? The point is nice is more attractive than nasty. Not just attractive as-in physically attractive. Attractive as-in more people will want to spend time with you. WORK with YOU, be a member of YOUR team. I bet you find it more enjoyable to work with people you like.

You might be wondering, well what about respect? Isn’t it more important for people to respect me than to like me? In a perfect world perhaps ALL your team members both like and respect you. Most of us live in an imperfect world. This means that not everyone will like you and when this is true your successful relationship will be based on respect. Now think for a moment. There is probably at least one person who you do not like, but you do respect. Did you have to overcome any challenges to cultivate your respect for that person? It is not always easy to respect someone you do not like. It is also difficult to work with someone who you like, but do not respect. Your likeability opens the door to successful professional relationships which do also need to include respect.

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